"I'm not thin enough to be taken seriously": the silent struggle of atypical anorexia
You don't have to look unwell to deserve help.
If food is taking over your thoughts, but everyone around you keeps saying "you look fine", I want you to know: You're not imagining it. You're not attention-seeking. And you're not alone.
Because there's a very real eating disorder that hides in plain sight, and it's called Atypical Anorexia.
What atypical anorexia really feels like
You wake up thinking about food. You go to bed feeling guilty for what you ate - or didn't eat. You plan your meals obsessively. You overthink calories, ingredients, textures, timings. You avoid social events because you don't trust yourself to "stay in control."
But here's the thing...
You don't "look sick enough."
So your GP doesn't follow it up. Your friends say, "You're being healthy." And your own inner critic tells you to keep going. That you haven't earned rest yet, that maybe you're just being dramatic.
It creates this unbearable limbo: Mentally drowning, but physically 'fine'. Too ill to feel okay, but not ill enough to be believed.
Why it gets missed
In our society, disordered eating is often praised instead of recognised: "You've lost weight, you look amazing!"
"You're so good with your food."
"I wish I had your discipline."
We complement food obsession. We confuse restriction with wellness. We mistake visible weight loss for the only sign of struggle.
But atypical anorexia doesn't always come with extreme weight loss, and that's where so many people fall through the cracks.
The truth about atypical anorexia
Clinically speaking, atypical anorexia shares all the same characteristics as anorexia nervosa:
Extreme restriction
Intense fear of gaining weight
Preoccupation with food, calories, numbers
Body image distortion
Often linked to perfectionism, anxiety, trauma, or neurodivergence
The only difference? Weight remains within or above a 'normal' range.
But the medical and emotional risks are still serious: electrolyte imbalance, heart issues, hormonal disruption, bone density loss, depression, anxiety, self-harm, exhaustion, fainting, and insomnia.
A personal reflection (therapist meets real life)
I've supported so many people, often women and teens, who told me the same thing:
"I'm not sick enough to deserve help."
They were restricting. They were obsessing. They were deeply unhappy in their bodies.
But because they didn't fit the "anorexic look," their pain was invisible.
Some were praised for their "willpower." Some were told to "keep going." Some were even told by professionals: "You don't meet the criteria for treatment."
Can you imagine being denied support because your body didn't look distressed enough?
That's the weight stigma at the heart of our system. And it's something we need to challenge.
What if it's not just a phase?
Atypical anorexia is not just a "fad diet" or "food fussiness." It's a serious mental health condition, and it deserves serious support.
But many people stay stuck because: they're high-functioning, they're praised for their control, they're neurodivergent and use food control to manage overwhelm, or they've learned to mask their distress.
You don't need to wait for a physical collapse to validate your experience. You're allowed to get help now, before things spiral further.
If this sounds familiar... here's what I want you to know
You don't need to be underweight to have an eating disorder. You don't need to justify your struggle to anyone. You don't need to keep waiting for permission to recover.
You're allowed to want freedom from food obsession.
Freedom from: decision fatigue, constant guilt, meal anxiety, the fear of "messing up", the voice in your head that tells you you're only valuable if you're in control.
How I can help
I'm Becky Stone, a therapist who specialises in eating disorders, neurodiversity, and trauma-informed recovery. I've supported hundreds of people through the grey areas of disordered eating, including atypical anorexia.
I work with both adults and teens, online and in Canterbury. And I believe: you are allowed to be heard before you hit a crisis, you deserve a space that doesn't judge your body, and you can recover in your way - without shame, without comparison, without needing to prove how sick you are.
You don't need to shrink yourself to be taken seriously
If you're tired of worrying about food... If you're exhausted from hiding how hard it is... If you've been told "you're fine" but you know you're not...
This is your sign. You deserve support. And you don't have to wait for rock bottom to ask for it.
Want to talk? If this blog resonated with you or someone you love, I offer safe, compassionate therapy for disordered eating, including atypical anorexia.